Youth Training: “What a Champion Looks Like” (Part 6 of 8)
Self Control: A Tenet of Great Champions
Today, it’s tough to exhibit self control.
Between a mixture of our internal competitiveness, and our online culture of “commenting without consequences”, the trait of self-control can be a tough one to build. However, this character trait is worth the effort because it will earn you respect, build your team in a positive way, and quite possibly define who you are.
As a phrase, “self-control” is the ability to control one self, to control your emotions or behavior, especially in difficult situations. It’s your ability to respond and not react. And it doesn’t come naturally. While self-discipline is more about what you do, self-control is more about what you don’t do.
James Russell Lowell once said, “Such power there is in clear-eyed self-restraint.”
It’s not saying what you really want to say. It’s not commenting when you’d really like to comment. It’s not throwing hand gestures or foul language, not giving attitude- when the situation prompts you to do so.
Training Self-Control
Playing sports, is a great way to build self-control. In fact, it is one of the best ways! As an athlete, you have the opportunity to work on this trait frequently in both the private arena and the public eye. In your practices, you will make choices in how your respond to your coach and teammates. Additionally, in every match you play, every game in which you participate, you will experience calls that go your way, and calls that don’t. The opportunity often arises as to how you are going to respond, especially when the call doesn’t go your way.
A couple of things to think about when you’re being tested:
- Take a deep breath before you say anything
- Realize sometimes it is best to “Brush it off” or just let it go
- Admit you only saw it from your perspective (a different one that of the ref, or your coach, or the fans)
- Understand that reacting poorly is a waste of your effort and doesn’t add to positively motivate your team (Or yourself)
Off the Field Training
While you’re not on the field, here are a few questions to ask yourself as you consider how you are doing with self-control:
When someone criticizes you, how do you respond?
When a referee makes a mistake, how do you respond?
When your coach asks you to do something you don’t want to, how do you respond?
Be truthful with yourself. Own up to the truth that you choose your response, no one else. Forgive yourself if you’ve acted in a way that isn’t what you wanted. Come up with one strategy you can use the next time an opportunity arises for you to use self-control. Understand this is a trait that needs to be practiced and the more you successfully respond, the easier it will become in the future. The more your self-control grows, the less situations will tempt you to react poorly.
Being able to control your responses, is something that takes practice, but can be built. You will never be able to respond the right way all the time, but building the habit of using your self-control, will become how people will know you, refer to you, and in many cases, define you. Positive champions all possess good self control.
Dig Deeper
Want to read a little more on how to develop this trait? Check out this short and helpful blog post on the power of self control.
Also, here is a sample look at the positive and negative effects sports can showcase.
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